Cukup Sudah

"I never thought i'd feel this way.

I never thought love would make me this way.

I never thought it'd be so hard to love you

..... because there's so much hurt involve."

_______

"Wanting you is hard to forget,

loving you is hard to regret,

losing you is hard to accept,

even with all the hurt i've felt,

letting you go,

is,

..... the most painful yet."

"Even the nicest people have their limits." adalah kalimat yang menggambarkan kondisi gue saat ini, yes, I've my limits. After all the things I've been through, after all this times I've been holding on to, I reach my own limit. I'm letting go. I'm letting someone who I really love go. I'm letting him go. -- Loh kenapa gitu? Katanya sayang? Tapi kok malah nyerah? Kalo sayang tuh diperjuangin dong bukan malah nyerah gitu -- I even sometimes have the same thought, I even sometimes ask myself the same question, but then, "Sometimes love means letting go when you want to hold on tighter." And yes baby that's true. Gue udah pernah bersabar, bahkan sampai kesabaran itu sendiri pun sangat menyakitkan. Gue udah pernah berjuang, bahkan saat perjuangan itu sendiri pun sangat tidak dianggap. Gue udah pernah bertahan, bahkan saat pertahanan itu sendiri pun tidak berguna lagi.  Gue tau dan sangat percaya kalo memang "Cinta itu butuh perjuangan", tapi di sisi lain, gue tau dan sangat percaya kalo memang "Ada saatnya kita harus stop, saat semua ketulusan kita tidak dihargai. Saat lebih banyak isak tangis daripada canda tawa." 

Back to the title of this post, that I've had enough. And I'm done with that. I cant take it anymore. Udah cukup buat semuanya. Gue belajar banyak dari pengalaman ini. Terlebih, gue belajar bahwa, menghargai diri sendiri itu penting sekali. Iya, gue baru sadar akan hal itu saat pengalaman pahit ini terjadi ke gue lagi. Ya, terjadi lagi untuk kesekian kalinya. Mencintai diri sendiri itu hal mutlak, dan memang, gue harus mencintai diri gue sendiri sebelum mencintai orang lain. Mungkin terdengar kind of selfish, tapi bukan itu yang gue maksud. Melainkan, bahwa, siapa lagi yang bisa menyayangi diri gue se-apa-ada-nya ini, kalo bukan gue sendiri? The one and only who can control over  you is yourself.

//Spread the positive vibes,

//CHA!©

HELLLO!

aaaakk finally! such an overwhelming feeling! sooo happy to finally meet you guys again. something happened with my blog, i forgot my account! i forgot my email and also the password as well. i cant even remember it at all. i've tried to remember what's my old email, i've tried to remember any words that could be possible to be my password, but none of them worked. so sad almost 1,5 years gue gak bisa akses blog ini. padahal udah kangen banget mau nulis ini itu.

beberapa hari ini gue emang bener-bener mikirin mau start blogging lagi, dan masih berusaha coba inget apa email dan password blog ini, sampai akhirnya semalem sekitar jam 11an, out of the blue something comes up in my mind and i was like "AAAA SUMPAH IYA INI EMAIL NYA!!!" hahahaha iya, serandom dan sekaget itu. gue langsung coba masuk dan..... puji Tuhan bisa. so here i am now :)

well since now i got my blog back, i will start to writing again soon as possible as i can.
really glad to have a chance to see you again now!

//Spread the positive vibes,

//CHA!©